What Is Birth?

Recently I began (as I often do) speaking to an acquaitence about birth. She cut me off before I could finish my sentence to tell me that she had no interest in "biology" and wanted a change of topic. I was rather shocked because I don't have a great interest in biology either, and I had no intention of discussing the biological aspects of birth. This encounter made me realise that my definition of birth is not the same as everyone else's definitions.

Clearly this acquaintence defines birth soley in terms of biological function and physiology: a baby leaving its mother's uterus. That's it. To me birth is so much more than that! I feel that defining birth as the removal of a baby from a body is dangerous because it devalues birth so much that it enables and legitimates unnecessary interventions and even unnecessary caesareans, because who cares? the baby got out and that's all that matters. Which leaves me with the question: how do I define birth?

Birth is physical, emotional, psychological, spiritual, and energetic. The physical aspects are obvious, we can see them in the way the birthing woman moves, the look on her face, the sounds she makes. We know that she dilates and then she pushes, we know that a baby moves down from her womb into her vagina and out. The emotional aspects of birth are also visible. If challenged and she reaches a crisis of confidence the birthing woman might cry and verbalise her feelings. Or she might weap tears of joy because she is so moved by her experience and knowing her baby is almost earthside. For some women giving birth involves a lot of touch, cuddling and kissing their partners, enjoying massage from trusted attendants or loved ones, holding hands etc.

Often a woman's physical and emotional limits are tested during childbirth, and like a marathon runner she will face the psychological challenges of feeling defeated, exhausted, and doubting her ability to see it through. If adequately supported and prepared (like any athlete) she will break through this barrier and triumphantly reach the finish line. And this makes birth athletic. Some women have long labours and others have long pre and early labours, cramping frequently for weeks before established labour. These experiences can be very psychological for the birthing woman. One of the most important parts of childbirth is surrendering to the process, to quit questioning, doubting, trying to guess when it will start or finish, whether it will get harder and if so how much harder and at what point will it get too hard? To stop from "psyching" themselves out, birthing women must let go of these musings and focus on the present moment.

Birth is spiritual in that it is the act of bringing another soul into the world and the final phase in the human creation process. Because birth demands of a woman that she be completely present to the moment it can be likened to meditation, and indeed the hormonal altered states of consciousness that come with having an unhindered birth can be experienced as spiritual.


As for the energetic aspect of birth, when you enter a birth space that the birthing woman has made her own the mood and feel of the environment is unlike any other you might encounter. At my own unhindered birth my doula's breasts began pouring milk into her bra when my baby entered the world. At my friend's birth my baby slept peacefully through her loud vocalising and my friend's toddlers were undisturbed by their mother's screaming, the mood of the birth space was peaceful and normal and the children picked up on that.

Birth is also very intimate and sexual. When women birth unhindered they do so naked, and each woman has a unique "birth song" (meaning the sounds they make during labour). Some women sing their birth song very loudly, others do so without parting their lips. Whenever I see an unhindered birth I am struck by how much birth is like sex. A lot of the noises women make during birth are orgasmic sounds. Indeed, some women experience orgasm during labour.

Birth is a beginning. The beginning of life in a new world for the baby. The beginning of parenting a new person. The beginning of new family dynamics. Potentially the beginning of a new family line should that baby decide to have children of her or his own later in life.

Birth is also an ending. The end of pregnancy. A farewell to the sacred time when mother and baby were physically one, when only mother could touch and feel her baby.

Birth is a welcoming. Whether we admit it or not a baby's birth day is her/his welcome to the world. There is no other moment like this in our lives, those first moments are precious and can never be repeated. No parent forgets the moment they first laid eyes on their child, the first time they held her or him, and the first time they heard their baby's cry. But parents are not always the one's who get to have the first hold, and not all babies get a true welcome to the world. Many babies are held by strangers first, are whisked away to be tested and measured, wiped, and wrapped up before their parents get a chance to say hello. Some mothers are separated from their babies for recovery from the procedures routinely carried out in hospitals and do not get to welcome thier babies for hours after birth. My own mother was so high on pethidine that at my own welcome to the world she didn't recognise me as her own.

Birth is an opportunity. It is an opportunity for women to realise the great depths of their strength, and for their partners and families to witness the awesome power of their loved one. It is also an opportunity for couples to become more intimate and bonded to one another, much like sex. Birth is another act of love making.

Birth is an experience of self discovery! The journey to birth, and the birth itself can bring up a lot of personal issues for everyone involved, especially the woman. For women who have strained or absent relationships with their mothers these issues can arise during pregnancy and labour as they face becoming a mother themselves. For women with poor body image or who have experienced abuse in the past, these issues can rear their ugly heads on account of the physicality of birth. The process of learning what she does or does not want from those around her in her birth space helps the blossoming mother become clearer about who she is. She also learns what she is capable of. Birth is a rite of passage. Cara Muhlhahn (the midwife featured in Rikki Lake's documentary The Business of Being Born) said it best when she said:

A woman really doesn't need to be rescued, it's not the place for the knight in shining armour. It's the place for her to face her darkest moments and lay claim to her victory, so that she can lay claim to her victory after she's done it.

Birth can also be a catalyst for change in a woman's life. By experiencing her power a woman's view of herself can be forever changed. She may begin birth as a girl and emerge a grown woman. On the other hand, if a woman is robbed of experiencing that power she may still be forever changed, but in a negative sense.

Birth is a snapshot of our culture more generally. Our culture is presently facing a crisis of drug use, the vast majority of births involve drug use. Our culture relies heavily on experts' advice rather than following instinct, almost 100% of women give birth following the directions of experts rather than trusting themselves. Our culture has high rates of violence against women, women are routinely rendered immobile, cut, penetrated with fingers, hands, forceps etc. during birth.

Birth is a reflection of our lives. Where a woman chooses to birth, who she choose to attend her and how she chooses to birth (eg. vaginally, drug free, interventions free etc.) give insight into who the birthing woman is and how she lives her life more generally.

Birth is heroic. An experience that demands so much of a person in every way imaginable cannot help but be heroic. It calls for the birthing mother to display characteristics of the hero including bravery in the face of fear (if she had any), pain endurance and stamina. Is it any wonder that mothers are so keen to regail pregnant women with their "horror" birth stories? These stories are their tales of battle, and they crave recognition for this.

Birth is primal. At birth a woman's neocortex (thinking part of the brain) becomes subdued to allow her primal (sometimes called mamillion or middle brain) to dominate. Women don't need to learn how to give birth, they don't need to be directed during labour, they were born with this knowledge by virtue of their sex. If unhindered a woman will instictively adopt the most safe and effective positions to help her baby out. She will make sounds she's never heard before to aid the process - often similar to sounds from the animal kingdom. During birth she is one with all female mamals. She becomes pre-verbal and pre-social, she grunts and moans, she vomits, urinates and poops wherever necessary.

Birth is a normal physiological process. Women's bodies are designed for the act of giving birth, perfected over centuries of evolution. Our hormones cause our bodies to soften as we near labour so that we are more flexible and physically prepared for birth. Our hormones also give us pain relief, help bond us to our babies, and take us to an altered state of conscious necessary for birth. Our uteruses expand to house our babies for as long as necessary and then massage our baby down toward the cervix and vagina during birth. Our cervix thins and opens wide enough to allow our babies to leave our wombs and descend into our vaginas. Our pelvic bones soften and are flexible to allow room for our babies to exit our bodies. Our vagina's stretch as wide as our babies need. If given the freedom and support necessary, women can give birth safely without any medical assistance! And we are reminded of this with every baby born "before arrival", by the side of the road, in the back seat of a car or on the front lawn of a hospital.

Birth is so many different things to different women. Most importantly birth is far more than a simple biological event in which baby leaves mother's body. It is my wish that people in our society were more aware of this and valued birth for all that it is, rather than ignoring women's stories, or trying to change women's stories by needlessly interfering in the natural process.

Birth is.

Taken minutes after birth

ETA: Mere minutes after publishing this I came across the blog of another doula who wrote this:

Ten Reasons I Love Birth

Because it is unpredictable
Because it is edgy and freaks most people out
Because every person in the world has experienced it at least once
Because it is mysterious
Because it means that much hard work is complete
Because it can feel good
Because it points to Intelligent design
Because it is raw and powerful
Because no two are alike
Because it allows women who feel ordinary to become extraordinary