We are half way through "Wattle's"
pregnancy, preparing ourselves for a third homebirth. Our five year old
is very enthusiastic about this upcoming birth and the baby (though she
is very clear she will be less enthused if we produce another sister for
her). She is keen to be at the birth and we are keen for her and her
two year old sister to be there to meet the baby as he or she enters the
world. As such we have taken to youtube to expose our children to the
raw honesty of birth to help them prepare.
In
addition to youtube the girls
have photos from their own births they're very familiar with (our five
year old is very upset that we didn't record her birth on video and put
it on youtube). There are also children's books about birth we plan to get soon, such as: Hello Baby, We're having a homebirth!!, My brother Jimmi Jazz, Birthing River and Mama, talk about when Max was born.
Our chlidren are very involved in our birth planning meets, they usually take a
seat on one of our midwive's laps for the duration, our birth team are
known as "Mumma's birth friends". Our five year old has her own special
role in our birth plan: to be the one to check and tell us if we have a
boy or a girl. She is thrilled to have the best job of all, in her eyes.
Our two year old is baby crazy and we hope her love for babies extends
to her sibling who she will have to share her parents with.
We
have selected one of our support people to focus on entertaining the
kids during the birth, if they're awake (with the assistance of my
partner). The plan is to have a special box of new craft activities,
toys and DVDs given to the children while I'm in labour to help keep
them entertained in their room if they're bored or need to be elsewhere
during birth.
The
possibility for involvement of older siblings is one of the many
benefits of birthing at home. I hope that this means the girls will find
the transition into becoming one of three will be a little less
turbulent if they are there to share the moment. Something else that
should help aid sibling bonding is our continued breastfeeding
relationships. The girls will get less time at the breast and learn to
wait longer because the baby's need is greater, but they will also learn
that a new baby doesn't mean the end of Mumma meeting their needs.
I
leave you with our family's favourite birth clips and a few words about why they're a hit with us.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DoIiVszj1EU
This one can't be embedded elsewhere, so head to youtube to watch. It's a very quick, accidentally unassisted birth, mother catching her baby in the bathtub.
This one is quick (my girls like when the babies are born quickly), it's clear and there is so much joy. It's also one of the few non-waterbirth videos.
Baby born in bathtub, Daddy assisted catch. We talk about how babies go straight from vagina to Mumma's chest, when we watch this one.
This one is an old favourite we also watched with 5yr old when she was preparing for the birth of our 2yr old. We talk about birth noises and how kids can help birthing Mummas.
This one is fantastic for talking to kids about how loud birth can be and how that's okay.
I love this one because they weren't expecting twins, the kids love it because there are two babies. It's a good one for talking about patience during birth.
Another one that's good for discussions about patience. But the highlight of this one is watching the mother catch her own baby, while birthing, standing upright.
This is a terrific birth clip for educating kids about patience, birth noises and for talking about the fact that some babies need some help when they are born, this video shows the Mumma performing neonatal resuscitation on her baby and it's calm. It's also good for talking about what Mummas need while birthing because this Mumma asks her midwife to give her quiet.
Another twin birth my girls love. We talk about patience and we talk about people touching the baby, a very important topic since the 5yr old wants to hold the baby as soon as he or she is born.
For more sources on siblings at birth:
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